How It Feels to Become a Mom By Adoption

Excerpt by Carly Levingston

I found this article and thought it was fitting for adoptive parents. This was written by an adoptive mom.

As a mom by adoption, my babies are mine, but I did not grow them.

I have two children. They came to us by adoption, and they complete our family.

My days are spent doing endless loads of laundry, creating boundaries, teaching life lessons, cooking, cleaning, etc.

As a mom by adoption, I have some unique worries.

I wonder if I’m doing it all right. Sometimes I worry that I’m not enough.

I also worry about them asking me hard questions about being adopted.

I wonder how they will feel when they learn that their birth moms have birthed and raised other children.

As a mom by adoption, grief, and joy often co-exist.

You adopt an infant and are present at the hospital, you continue holding your breath until they sign the termination paperwork.

You’re falling in love with this baby, yet they aren’t legally yours.

You want to love with reckless abandon, yet you’re trying to be sensitive to the emotions of the birth family, who are grieving before your eyes but trying to stay brave.

As a mom by adoption, sometimes it’s hard to see my babies not look like me.

When I look at my babies, I see their birth parents. They look exactly like their biology, as they should.

I get to tell my kids how much they look like their birth mommy and daddy and deepen the conversation when asked where they came from. It’s an emotional slippery slope, but I’m willing to accept the challenge.

As a mom by adoption, I am absolutely blessed.

Adoption is a beautiful mess, which, in turn, has been the biggest blessing of my entire family’s lives.

I’m just like any other mom, although I took a slightly different journey getting here.

And our life will look just a little bit different going forward.

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